You're WHAT?
by Lady Karasu
Summary: Shameless Wufei torture, thanks to a Treize prank. Bad description, read it anyway.


Just a little vignette. Hopefully a funny one, but hey, its up to you. This is in keeping with the running fanfic gag, of Wufei coming to challenge Treize multiple times. C&C welcome, as always. Standard disclaimers apply.

~Lady Karasu  
'Spork no Miko'

You're What?!?  
(or. A different 5+6+13)

Would you like a glass as well?, Treize called over his shoulder to the blonde in the other room.

, came the response.

He smiled to himself as he poured two glasses of wine.Very fine wine, saved for special occasions._When was the last time we had the time to simply sit and talk?This war is taking its toll on everyone_

He smiled slightly, turning back with a glass in either hand._Well, tonight there is no war, just two old friends getting to talk about old times._

What's so funny?A curious voice pulled him from his thoughts.

Oh, nothing., Returning to the couch, Treize relinquished one glass to his companion.It just feels good to relax for once.

Zechs leaned back against the sanguine couch.He ran a hand absently through his hair, glad for once, to be out of that helmet.At the thought, he looked briefly at the table next to him, where said item rested.He rarely took it off in public anymore, but his friend had known for a long time who he really was, so the front was unnecessary here.Gratefully.

So, has he been back recently?, Zechs asked mildly, a small smile crossing his face as he looked back to Treize, who, to his great amusement let out a small groan at the question.  
  
Oh, don't bring that up now, he pressed fingers to the bridge of his nose, trying to relieve the sudden pressure.Treize looked back up with burdened look on his face.He's been back three times now.I always beat him and let him go, but he's determined to win., he looked upwards, with a long suffering sigh, I'm not entirely sure why he keeps coming back- I think he's got personal issues, but I'm almost ready to stage my own defeat just to get him to stop

Zechs raised an eyebrow in question.Is it really that bad?

It's not so much the intrusion, as the timing, I mean, every time IHe stopped short, as he heard a sound from the terrace.He hung his head, finishing, That would be himTaking a cleansing breath, he raised his head, squared his shoulders and he strode into the next room, Zechs not far behind.

The object of their conversation stood at the now open door, sword raised.

I have come to challenge you!

Yes, yes, you're right on time Treize murmured under his breath, continuing after raising his voice, Are you sure you wouldn't rather join us for some wine?He proffered the glass with an inviting, if albeit weary, look.

Alcohol weakens the mind and body.Get you're blade and accept my challenge!

Hefting a sigh, Treize complied, returning to the other room to recover his blade.On the way back out, he set down his glass on the same table as Zechs' Mask. And had a deliciously mischievous idea.

would you mind?

At the nodded- if somewhat confused- ascension, he scooped up the item.As he walked back out, mocked his fencing form and held it firmly behind his back.

Stopping across from opponent, he raised the blade to eye level, and then dropped into the first stance.Generally he waited for Wufei to make the first move.En guard He waited, watching the boy watch him.

Then the dance began.

Wufei charged, in that determined way he had, and Treize sidestepped.He turned to catch the first actual blow with his rapier, then deflected, pushing the boy's weight to the side.Wufei would turn and wait for another moment before coming again, waiting for Treize to be ready.Charging for a second time, the swords connected again, and again, trying to reach flesh.Well, one sword tried to reach flesh anyway, the other simply fended off attacks.

Zechs watched it all from the sidelines, wondering if this boy was suicidal.It certainly seemed that way.He watched, after a while, with a smile, when Treize noticed the same weakness in his opponent's defense.With a flick of his wrist, and a well-placed shove, Wufei stumbled forward and fell to his knees.

Wufei's grimace intensified, curling up into a silent snarl.He tensed, berating himself as the now all too familiar feel of metal met his throat.What he failed to notice, was when Treize now removed the item he had held behind his back 

Angrily, Wufei bore holes in the floor with the force of his glare.His hands clenched, one in a white-knuckle grip on his own sword.The sword he had failed to utilize again. There was a strange sound above himalmost like labored breath.there's something you must know He looked up slowly, eyes past the point of glaring to find himself blinking back in surprise._What the.?_

Treize stood above him, mask firmly in place.He never noticed when the blade fell away.His eyes widened as Treize continued.

I am you're father

Zechs nearly died at the look on Wufei's face. Said pilot's eyes had gone wide, and rolled back into his head.With a choked groan and a _thump _the boy was out.

Was that really necessary?Zechs prompted,his grin negating the potentially chastising comment.  
Treize simply smiled, removing the helmet. "It served it's purpose quite effectively, did it not?" Zechs shook his head in amusement. "That it did, but what do we do with him now? I've never known you to take advantage of a helpless opponent..."

An mischievously evil gleam entered the general's eyes, "oh, I've just had a delicious idea... "   
He turned to his compatriot,"Zechs, would you get the box in the other room... and the camera...? I have to get our _friend_ ready for a short trip."

~~~~~~~~

[Later - somewhere, in the middle of nowhere]

*click*

Another photo fluttered down to the ground.

"Well", Treize replied, regarding their handiwork with an artists eye, "Somehow I don't think he's going to be back any time soon..." With a self-satisfied smile, he handed back the helmet. "Shall we begin where we left off?"

Zechs shared his grin, nodding. "By all means, lead the way."

~~~~~~~~ 

Wufei stalked back into the safe house, heading strait for his room'.  
Lose again?, Duo questioned over his shoulder, a wicked grin on his face.  
Wufei never stopped or commented, but continued on to his space, slammed and locked the door.  
, Duo turned back to Quatre, He must really be shaken up.I usually get at least a Kisama' out of him

~~~Owari~~~


End file.
